Everything I Know Is Wrong

So of course there’s been all this jibber-jabber about the 52 year old soap opera Guiding Light going off the air, and it got me to thinking a little about the show, and the brief period that I actually tuned in back in the mid 80’s. And, with a little help from google, arrived at the most amazing discovery. Well, for me, that is.

Firstly, I never started out as much of a soap watcher. When I was twelve I got hooked on Dark Shadows, which of course by the early 80’s had been long cancelled. But the local channels used to rerun the series at noon every weekday, so while all of my friends were busy obsessing over the freshly-new schmoopfest of Luke and Laura I was hanging on every word of already long-kaput bloodsucker Barnabas Collins – until perhaps a year later, when school and life got in the way of keeping track of events. Much like most of us when we lose track of any soap.

My mother used to watch Guiding Light when she was pregnant with me, but it never occurred to me to tune in to the lives of the beautiful and big-haired (that were not vampires… sheeeyuh!) until around 1984 when, while hanging out at my friend and next-door neighbor Jeanne’s house, I was surprised to see her turn on the telly at 3pm and exclaim that she had become a Guiding Light fan overnight, literally, because she was hooked on this one tough little punk chick who was the leader of a street gang and was currently holding two characters hostage by gunpoint in Cedars Hospital for several days so far on the program. “She’s awesome!” said Jeanne. “And so hilarious!” Punk girl? Awesome? Hilarious? You didn’t have to tell me twice. I sat down and watched with her, and from that moment on, I feel in love with the foofy-haired girl with the thick Brooklyn accent who was known on the show as Darcy Dekker.

Oh, she was so blessed wonderful. Angry, jealous, and soooo wrong side of the rich and decorative people part of town. Described on an APB in one episode as having "a fog-horn voice and all the charm of a Heavy Metal nightmare.", she did everything from mug people in alleyways, holding rich baronesses hostage, and shoot somebody while disguised as a nurse (my friend Sheryl, who was still hooked on General Hospital and never tuned into Guiding Light no matter how much I gushed about Darcy, was knocked off her socks by that scene, and was gripped with the lure of Darcy herself for a brief period of time). In many ways she was sort of a cipher. Television’s commonly misguided idea of a “punk” in the 80’s, out of control and violent and nothing but fire-breathing hostility and daddy-didn’t-love-me issues. But as evil as she was, my heart went out to her. She was fun, and fun to hiss like the villain she was paid to play. But she was vulnerable, too. At times. But enough to understand her, when she allowed us to do so. I utterly loved her.

After about a year or so of Darcy’s delightfully over-the-top badass sudsy antics, she left the show in 1985 (I think she was shot to death, but don’t quote me on that), and although I continued to watch for a few more years all the way up to my freshman year of college (luckily my roommate was a fan too) I gradually lost interest in the show. I had school, and a boyfriend, and all kinds of projects and activities going on to keep me away from the tube. But more importantly, the show no longer had Darcy, and honestly, Guiding Light lost its allure for me with her departure.

Although the mental image of Darcy gradually slipped through my sieve-like mind, I could always recall that year Jeanne and I would tune into Guiding Light only for Darcy, and in some form or fashion, that pouty face, that shock of red hair, and that raspy New Yawk honk was always burned into the back of my head. And I thought I would never forget it.

Ho boy, was I ever wrong.

Tonight as I was trying to google some information on her – including her character name (I had even forgotten that her name was Darcy) as well as the actress who played her – I was suddenly knocked breathless by my discovery, just less than an hour ago.

Darcy Dekker on Guiding Light was played by Robin Johnson.

Yes, THAT Robin Johnson, the one who played Nicky (seen here on the right with co-star Trini Alvarado on the left) from one of my favorite cult movies of all time, Times Square. How did I never…. Okay, just…. Gah. How did I not recognize…? Rrrrrr! Okay, I first saw Times Square around 1988 or 89, after getting a vinyl copy of the soundtrack at a flea market in Roanoke, VA in 1987 which I played RELIGIOUSLY (I still get nostalgic chills hearing Roxy Music’s “Same Old Scene” during the opening credits to this movie, remembering that year in college when this soundtrack was all I played). Maybe Nicky seemed familiar, but then again maybe not. It’s so hard to wrap my brain around it all now, because Nicky…. Is Robin Johnson. And Robin Johnson was Darcy Dekker. Otherwise known to me as “that punk chick that made me watch Guiding Light against my will.” Holy smokes. Suddenly it’s all falling into place. I mean… (shakes head) oh well, nevermind.

Here I was about to write a nice little send-off to a long-running soap opera that provided many hours of enjoyment for a brief epoch of my life. Now I’m just shocked and frustrated and utterly flabbergasted at myself. Thanks a flippin' heap, Guiding Light. I hope Reva Lewis finally takes a big dive offa something high into something prickly.

And because I'm extra mad at myself and want to take it out on the world, enjoy this supremely cheesy Springsteen rip-off video by Darcy’s ex-boyfriend Lujack, that aired around the same time. God, I remember tuning into the episode that premiered this video with actual excitement. Seeing this now, Christ. Darcy should have just put a slug in his head and be done with him. You go, Nicky Darcy.

Thanks to robinjohnson.net for the page on Darcy Dekker.