Seventh Inning Itch
Has anyone ever been in a position where they were having a session of scorching, sweaty, angry sex with their partner and then suddenly the whimsical tinkle of music emanating from the ice cream truck passing under your open window comes out of nowhere and it takes every ounce of your resolve not to burst out into uproarious laughter and ruin the romantic moment?
Er, okay, I thought not. Never mind, then.
Yep, I'm still awake. Still got the vut-vuts. And I'm a little, er, boy crazy at the moment. And the only decent porn I can find online at this point in time is the video to House Of Schock's "Middle Of Nowhere", which I actually already have on tape complete with multi-generation dubbing static so this much cleaner version down at yonder youtube really brings out the miraculous curves and angles of Mr. DeGeneres' rather, uh, narrow denim-clad backside when he saunters cowpoke-style over towards the car to ravish the sleeping Gina Schock within. Okay so he doesn't ravish her. But dammit this is my filthy little fantasy, alright? Besides, my deeply cherished copy of Harcèlement au Féminin is in the other room right now. The movie which, by the way, first introduced me to this magnificent blue-eyed Bavarian...
Behold. One of the few men alive today who has seen me naked and actually came away from the experience relatively unscathed. Although I'm sure the many resulting scars beneath the surface run soulfully deep.
Oh hell. Why did I have to go post a picture of Steve Holmes from that movie? Now I gotta go take a shower. A long one. Outside. In the rain. And no more fucking coffee for me!!
Er, okay, I thought not. Never mind, then.
Yep, I'm still awake. Still got the vut-vuts. And I'm a little, er, boy crazy at the moment. And the only decent porn I can find online at this point in time is the video to House Of Schock's "Middle Of Nowhere", which I actually already have on tape complete with multi-generation dubbing static so this much cleaner version down at yonder youtube really brings out the miraculous curves and angles of Mr. DeGeneres' rather, uh, narrow denim-clad backside when he saunters cowpoke-style over towards the car to ravish the sleeping Gina Schock within. Okay so he doesn't ravish her. But dammit this is my filthy little fantasy, alright? Besides, my deeply cherished copy of Harcèlement au Féminin is in the other room right now. The movie which, by the way, first introduced me to this magnificent blue-eyed Bavarian...
Behold. One of the few men alive today who has seen me naked and actually came away from the experience relatively unscathed. Although I'm sure the many resulting scars beneath the surface run soulfully deep.
Oh hell. Why did I have to go post a picture of Steve Holmes from that movie? Now I gotta go take a shower. A long one. Outside. In the rain. And no more fucking coffee for me!!
posted by Melissa at 2:02 AM
3 Comments:
are you ready for the real grand slam!
Cheeky monkey!
Mister "Anonymous" here is referring to the time when he and I were attempting to have sex years ago while this song was playing in the background. We hung in there pretty solid until the line about Tom Brokaw in the Denny's restaurant before we collapsed into into such thunderous laughter that we just to stop at that point. Still a pretty special song to us to this day.
AHHH!!! I was just about to bring up the grand slam story!
But Miser Anoymous beat me to it.
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