Nautical But Nice

When Joe first signed us up for Netflix, he asked our friend Mike what movie he would recommend us to first put in our queue. "The Boatniks!" he exclaimed, without hesitating. Whether or not he was being sarcastic at the time was hard to tell, but Joe went ahead and added it anyway, being that he had never seen it before. The poor, poor thing.

I, on the other hand, practically grew up with the madcap Disney picture, back when the local Great Bridge movie theater (now a hip-hop club) ran a lot of Disney flicks during the summer afternoon matinees, where it was close enough for us as kids to walk to every day. And although Mike hasn't seen it since it first opened in the theaters in 1970, I haven't seen nor even thought about the movie since my last viewing back in 1980 when my 6th grade elementary school turned their cafeteria into a makeshift movie theater and ran the film one Friday night. Mike only remembers the theme song, which certainly due to Disney diligence isn't available anywhere on the net, but he reminded me that it went something like "doot-doot doo-dee-doot-doot-doot-dee-doo-doo... BOOOOOAT-NIIIIIKS!" in a deep bass voice perhaps redolent of a ship's horn, which I delighted in Mike recreating (from memory!) for me during brunch yesterday.

However, reliving the film yesterday for the first time in thirty years I was amazed at how little I remembered anything about what I once thought was one of the funniest movies I'd ever seen at the tender age of, uh, eleven or twelve. Only two things seized me with instant recognition. The scene where Stefanie Powers gets yellow paint dumped all over her head, and proceeds to bitch about it through half he film.

And most notably, the scene that made me laugh the hardest, when the submarine launches a loaf of lunch meat at the Coast Guard and it hits the hull of the ship with a fleshy "thud", and Don Ameche yells "It's a SALAMI!" in a pitch perfect combination of sound and sight gaggery that had me clutching my tummy with laughter like a giggling little girl.... back when I was a giggling little girl. I couldn't find that one isolated clip but you can savor that trademark Disney nuanced hilarity for yourself in the movie trailer below.



Other than that... holy heck, how did I ever think this movie was funny? But it has all the right elements for bringin' the funny! Norman Fell, people! Phil freakin' Silvers! Wally Cox as a dipsomaniac womanizer, in the role you always imagined that he could play! And... and Joe E. Ross, doing what... what Joe E. Ross is known for! But on a BOAT, dontchaknow! And... uh..... NORMAL FELL, you guys! Did you hear me the first time? NORMAN FELLLLLL?

But now at least I can argue with my mother from back when we used to watch Hart To Hart together and she tried to reassure me that Stefanie Powers had bad arm skin just like I do. Hate to break it to ya, ma, but I think it's just freckles. Lovely.... lovely.... frecklesssss.